Friendships happen when we aren’t even looking for them

The following is an excerpt from the book, Real Life Moments, by J. Mark Fox.

“Can two walk together unless they are agreed?” (Amos 3:3)

We traveled in a seven-passenger van from Florida to Connecticut and as far west as Upland, Indiana, where we performed at Taylor University, and to an Air Force base in Michigan. 

I remember setting up our instruments and singing in the inner city of Bridgeport, Connecticut. It was a hot day and the people were outside, trying to find a cool spot or pass the time away with friends. 

I remember a concert in a maximum security prison in Maryland. The chaplain’s name escapes me, but I can still see his face and hear the compassion in his voice for the men in his prison. 

I remember a concert in Blanch prison, just up the road in Milton. We were told by the chaplain before we went in that each of these men between the ages of 18 and 21 was sent to Blanch either for his own protection or for the protection of others. 

We walked each cell block, singing songs and sharing a brief message of hope. 

I remember many concerts in churches and nursing homes and schools. It was during these two years that God did some very important things in my heart and in my family. 

Cindy and I were part of a ministry team in the early 1980s called “Damascus Road,” which was under the umbrella of New Directions International in Graham. The other team members were Joel and Sonia, a couple who had been a part of the New Directions for many years before we showed up on the scene. 

Joel was the leader of Damascus Road, and he and Sonia were the primary musicians and singers. Cindy and I sang backup and worked hard at trying not to mess up the songs. 

My job was to help line up the bookings for the group, to help Joel with the equipment at each concert, and to give the message. 

It was during these two years that I cut my teeth in preaching, and learned many lessons the hard way. 

I remember Joel sitting me down after a trip to Columbus, Georgia. He told me what the pastor of the church there had said about my preaching: “You can’t.” 

I was crushed, but thankful that my friend Joel would “speak the truth in love.” During a period of soul-searching and prayer, God reconfirmed His call to me to preach, but He also showed me how much I had depended more on my “abilities” than on His. 

I also came face to face with my own prejudice during these two years, and God did a marvelous thing. As we traveled and sang and prayed and ate and lodged with Joel and Sonia, we saw how much we were alike. We also came to understand and appreciate our cultural differences and to love each other through them all. 

Cindy and I started having children when we were still traveling with Damascus Road, and Joel and Sonia were our first teachers in the area of child-rearing.

I look back to those days when we walked together with Joel and Sonia with great fondness, and thank God for using them to change our hearts. 

Perhaps the best way to overcome racial prejudice is to work together on the same team. Friendships happen when you aren’t even looking.

Prayer: “Lord, help me to love people the way You do, and expand my friendships to people from other cultures besides my own.”

Action:  If you have a friend from a different race or cultural background, invite him to lunch this week.

Take me back to C4FIC.org

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About C4FIC

The Council for Family-Integrated Churches exists to promote reverence for the gospel in order to reform the church and restore the home as an embassy of the kingdom of God.
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