I need friends who will tell me the truth

The following is an excerpt from the book, Real Life Moments, by J. Mark Fox, C4FIC Board member.

Real Life Moments

“Faithful are the wounds of a friend, but the kisses of an enemy are deceitful” (Proverbs 27:6).

“Hey, Fox! What are you readin’?”

I knew that voice. It was coming from two seats behind me in history class. It belonged to a kid in our high school that everyone avoided because he was considered a nerd, a geek, a loser. I slowly turned, my mind spinning with anticipation of what I was about to do. My eyes fixed on my opponent. Actually, he wasn’t trying to pick a fight; Rick was just asking an innocent question, but in that nerdish way of his that provoked so many in the school to tease him.

“Why don’t you see for yourself?” I said, as I hurled the paperback I was reading. The missile found its desired target: Rick’s pimply face. The same face that was red with acne now turned beet red with rage.

Rick stood up beside his desk, his overlarge Adam’s apple moving up and down like a yo-yo, in sync with his breaths. He was angry and embarrassed by my attack. In all of the wisdom that I could muster as a tender young scholar of 17, I leaped to my feet and began to shadow box in front of Rick.

“You want a piece of me, Rick?” I taunted. “You want some of this?” I punched at him playfully, my fists pulling up just inches short of his face.

Rick was tall and as skinny as a toothpick, but his reach was at least a foot longer than mine. While I was floating like a butterfly, he decided to sting like a bee. Rick sent one true jab right to the center of my face. It was a direct hit to the mouth, exactly where I deserved it, and the fight was over just that quick. I was stunned as I reached up to my two front teeth and found they were not hanging out in their usual location.

You see, I had just gotten my braces off about a week earlier. Rick had undone in one second what my orthodontist (and my Dad’s wallet, bless his soul) had taken 2 and 1/2 years to accomplish.

Not only that, but I was immediately sent to the principal’s office, paddled, and sent home for three days’ suspension for fighting in class. Talk about adding insult to injury!

Two root canals, two crowns, and thousands of dollars later, I was talking to my grandmother about the incident. I will never forget her counsel that day.

“Mark, you don’t know anything about that boy. For all you know, his father beats him every day when he gets home from work. For all you know, that boy cries himself to sleep every night because of the suffering that you know nothing about. What that boy needs is a friend, and you just piled on to his misery. You got what you deserved.”

My grandmother loved me enough to tell me the truth. She was a true friend in every sense of that word, faithful to ‘wound’ me rather than ‘kiss’ me. Even though her words hurt just about as much as Rick’s punch to the kisser, my grandmother’s counsel that day turned my anger to repentance, and my thoughts of revenge to remorse.

I need all the friends like that I can find.

Prayer: “Thank You, Lord, that You have put friends in my life who are willing to speak the truth in love to me when I need it. Help me always to listen.”

Action: Take a good friend out for lunch this week and thank him for having the courage to tell you the truth, even when it hurts.

Take me back to C4FIC.org


About C4FIC

The Council for Family-Integrated Churches exists to promote reverence for the gospel in order to reform the church and restore the home as an embassy of the kingdom of God.
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